11.30.2003
Spiderwebs
One thing that I absolutely resent doing is lying to myself. Which is why, everytime something emotionally-challenging happens, I spend an awful lot amount of time figuring out what I SHOULD be feeling (as opposed to what I really AM feeling). I believe that by doing so, my feelings will be "genuine" & later on I will not have to suffer from the consequences of suppressing what's hidden (or what I've assumed to be hidden). Ironic, isn't it?? The other side of me though, tells me that I should just leave my feelings alone & stop justifying them, because really, that's not how our system works. So everytime I end up in a very confused state of mixed emotions - I never know what I'm truly feeling inside.
God I just hate how my heart & my head never work together...=\
One thing that I absolutely resent doing is lying to myself. Which is why, everytime something emotionally-challenging happens, I spend an awful lot amount of time figuring out what I SHOULD be feeling (as opposed to what I really AM feeling). I believe that by doing so, my feelings will be "genuine" & later on I will not have to suffer from the consequences of suppressing what's hidden (or what I've assumed to be hidden). Ironic, isn't it?? The other side of me though, tells me that I should just leave my feelings alone & stop justifying them, because really, that's not how our system works. So everytime I end up in a very confused state of mixed emotions - I never know what I'm truly feeling inside.
God I just hate how my heart & my head never work together...=\
11.29.2003
Visual Aid
Look what I made today!! xD (oh how I love being a science student)
![[DNA...in a very simplified manner]](dnas.jpg)
Look what I made today!! xD (oh how I love being a science student)
![[DNA...in a very simplified manner]](dna.jpg)
Tally
Here's the final ranking of the quiz that I sent to my friends...
Some stats:
Number of people invited to take it: 13
Number of people who actually took it: 13
Number of people who got 100: 0 (I'm very disappointed...)
Mean: 62 (rounded up to the nearest whole number)
Median: 60
Mode: 50
Comments:
I honestly don't think the quiz was that hard...a few of them were give-aways, while the hard ones you can pretty much guess the right answer using proper logic. =P Anyway, it was fun. I did this in back in gr. 11 or something & I think the results were even worse, lol. Some people improved while others just never learn...<sigh>
To those who are #1...remind me to give you guys akiss hug when I see you next time. To those who got 50 or below...shame on you. xP
I really have the urge to rearrange the ranking according to how long we've known each other...so the longer you've known me, the same score you get with someone else, the lower your rank will be. Then again, the quality of a friendship can't necessarily be measured by its length of time...still, a few of you (those who are skin-close to me) really should've done better!! <grunts>
Here's the final ranking of the quiz that I sent to my friends...
| Rank | Score | |
| Bonnie, Elaine, Keith | ||
| Benji, Carmen | ||
| Julianna, Katie, Taylor | ||
| Jennifer, Mickie, Nelson, Winnie | ||
| Baron |
Some stats:
Number of people invited to take it: 13
Number of people who actually took it: 13
Number of people who got 100: 0 (I'm very disappointed...)
Mean: 62 (rounded up to the nearest whole number)
Median: 60
Mode: 50
Comments:
I honestly don't think the quiz was that hard...a few of them were give-aways, while the hard ones you can pretty much guess the right answer using proper logic. =P Anyway, it was fun. I did this in back in gr. 11 or something & I think the results were even worse, lol. Some people improved while others just never learn...<sigh>
To those who are #1...remind me to give you guys a
I really have the urge to rearrange the ranking according to how long we've known each other...so the longer you've known me, the same score you get with someone else, the lower your rank will be. Then again, the quality of a friendship can't necessarily be measured by its length of time...still, a few of you (those who are skin-close to me) really should've done better!! <grunts>
11.25.2003
Sounds From Above
Spent pretty much the whole day listening to DAI's new album (that, & No Doubt's single collection...all the while I'm doing my heinous bio prelab...=P). Excuse the swearing, but...it's abso-fucking-lutely amazing. There isn't a single track on this album that I do not like. And there are quite a few that I am madly in love with. I must say that my fandom has been fully restored (FYI, I lost a big part of it after the disappointing "TRUE SONG"). Now let's move on to the review, shall we??
First of all, the title - definitely their best one as of yet. It's so cool, I immediately wanted to buy the album as soon as I found out the name of it. xP The cover is also beautiful (stunning visualization of the title itself), though I think it would've looked even better if Tomiko still had her trademark long hair (it'd be so much nicer to have it flying in the wind...). Not to mention that the red coat she's wearing doesn't really go with the rest of the colours...
And the music. As I've already mentioned, simply breathtaking. I dare not claim this as their best album (that'd be "DEEP FOREST", still love it after so many listens), but definitely comparable to their old stuff. I know songs like "Mahou no kotoba" really disappointed a lot of the long-time fans (including me), saying how it's totally un-DAI & just silly-sounding in general. But that's the essence of DAI's music - they keep trying out new styles until they've found a new sound to settle with...& I'm more than fine with where they are at now. The most pleasant surprise that this album gave me is the fact that variety has been reinstated, something that "TRUE SONG" seriously lacked. You've got the medium-tempo rock DAI's great at, the happy songs that they love to sing in public performances, & slow ones that's always got the best of acoustics. They could have had at least another great ballad though (like how "Enrai" was there on top of the already classic "Fukai mori"), but I think "Field of dreams" does a pretty good job in matching "Hiiragi".
I seriously like every single track on this album, but here are the ones I just keep listening to over & over again:
"Honjitsu wa seiten nari", "Hiiragi", "D/N/A" (favourite new track...& how cool is it for DAI to write a song for a genetics student like me!! xD), "Field of dreams", "Kagaku no yoru"
Spent pretty much the whole day listening to DAI's new album (that, & No Doubt's single collection...all the while I'm doing my heinous bio prelab...=P). Excuse the swearing, but...it's abso-fucking-lutely amazing. There isn't a single track on this album that I do not like. And there are quite a few that I am madly in love with. I must say that my fandom has been fully restored (FYI, I lost a big part of it after the disappointing "TRUE SONG"). Now let's move on to the review, shall we??
First of all, the title - definitely their best one as of yet. It's so cool, I immediately wanted to buy the album as soon as I found out the name of it. xP The cover is also beautiful (stunning visualization of the title itself), though I think it would've looked even better if Tomiko still had her trademark long hair (it'd be so much nicer to have it flying in the wind...). Not to mention that the red coat she's wearing doesn't really go with the rest of the colours...
And the music. As I've already mentioned, simply breathtaking. I dare not claim this as their best album (that'd be "DEEP FOREST", still love it after so many listens), but definitely comparable to their old stuff. I know songs like "Mahou no kotoba" really disappointed a lot of the long-time fans (including me), saying how it's totally un-DAI & just silly-sounding in general. But that's the essence of DAI's music - they keep trying out new styles until they've found a new sound to settle with...& I'm more than fine with where they are at now. The most pleasant surprise that this album gave me is the fact that variety has been reinstated, something that "TRUE SONG" seriously lacked. You've got the medium-tempo rock DAI's great at, the happy songs that they love to sing in public performances, & slow ones that's always got the best of acoustics. They could have had at least another great ballad though (like how "Enrai" was there on top of the already classic "Fukai mori"), but I think "Field of dreams" does a pretty good job in matching "Hiiragi".
I seriously like every single track on this album, but here are the ones I just keep listening to over & over again:
"Honjitsu wa seiten nari", "Hiiragi", "D/N/A" (favourite new track...& how cool is it for DAI to write a song for a genetics student like me!! xD), "Field of dreams", "Kagaku no yoru"
Break Of Dawn
Crazy DAI fan I am...it's now 5 something in the morning & I'm up just to listen to their new album "GATES OF HEAVEN" (freshly downloaded...don't worry, I already pre-ordered mine, should get here soon...^^). It's all worth it though...currently in love with it. =) Maybe a review later when I have time...
EDIT: Yo man I better get this poster somehow...
Crazy DAI fan I am...it's now 5 something in the morning & I'm up just to listen to their new album "GATES OF HEAVEN" (freshly downloaded...don't worry, I already pre-ordered mine, should get here soon...^^). It's all worth it though...currently in love with it. =) Maybe a review later when I have time...
EDIT: Yo man I better get this poster somehow...
11.23.2003
You Think You Know...But You Have No Idea
Man this is so much fun...I have successfully humiliated some of my friends & realized that some others know me better than I thought they do (or are better guessers than I expected them to be, lol). Honestly if you read my blog once in a while, those questions shouldn't be impossible (er hello, my thing with odd numbers??). So my dear friends, if you want to know what's most recent about me, drop by & you shouldn't be disappointed. But for those who actually visit regularly, may I ask you to please leave a comment one time or another?? I hate having silent readers (you know who you are!! =P)...
Man this is so much fun...I have successfully humiliated some of my friends & realized that some others know me better than I thought they do (or are better guessers than I expected them to be, lol). Honestly if you read my blog once in a while, those questions shouldn't be impossible (er hello, my thing with odd numbers??). So my dear friends, if you want to know what's most recent about me, drop by & you shouldn't be disappointed. But for those who actually visit regularly, may I ask you to please leave a comment one time or another?? I hate having silent readers (you know who you are!! =P)...
11.16.2003
Are You Ready?
For personal reference...my exam schedule this term.
CHM220H - December 8, 19:00-22:00
BIO250Y - December 10, 09:00-12:00
...& that's it. xD
For personal reference...my exam schedule this term.
CHM220H - December 8, 19:00-22:00
BIO250Y - December 10, 09:00-12:00
...& that's it. xD
Contradiction~Episode II~¹
I'm so confused...should we be friends or should we be more than friends?? And do I even have a choice?? We're so right yet so wrong for each other. I want to let you know that you're not alone, but I've just realized that I might not want to approach it the romantic way...
What to do?? x_x
¹: To save you some time...the first entry titled "Contradiction" can be found here. And what do you know...they happen to be about the same person!! I would've never guessed at the time that there'd be a continuation of events...
I'm so confused...should we be friends or should we be more than friends?? And do I even have a choice?? We're so right yet so wrong for each other. I want to let you know that you're not alone, but I've just realized that I might not want to approach it the romantic way...
What to do?? x_x
¹: To save you some time...the first entry titled "Contradiction" can be found here. And what do you know...they happen to be about the same person!! I would've never guessed at the time that there'd be a continuation of events...
11.14.2003
Learned Helplessness
Two nights ago, the worst possible thing happened to me - my cable went down. Actually, it was my modem that short-circuited after a Goddamn lightning bolt hit near my house. So for two days, I had to live without internet. For an addict like me, it was simply unimaginable & unbearable. I was clearly suffering from the signs of withdrawl - irritation, irritation, & irritation. "Fortunately", a technician from Rogers finally came today to replace the modem (even that took nearly 2 hours). Everything worked fine - except for the fact that, somehow, my Windows XP isn't recognizing the new modem & still keeps telling me that my cable connection has been unplugged. This means that if I REALLY want to go onto the internet, I will have to use the last resort, which is exactly what I'm doing now. That, ladies & gentlemen, is called "using my old & crappy computer which runs on Windows 95". Oh the horror.
I made a list of advantages & disadvantages of doing so...
Advantages
I can go online & therefore can talk to my friends through ICQ
A majority of my CM collection (the old, "cream of the crop" ones) is on here & I can watch them
Disadvantages
It is slow, VERY slow (at least 5 times slower than my new computer)
It is loud
I can download shit 'cause it has absolutely no space left
It freezes easily & frequently (did so while I was typing up this entry)
It runs on 800x600 resolution
MSN doesn't work on here
ICQ on here is still 2001b & IT FREEZES EVERYTIME I SCROLL THROUGH THE LIST
I can't use my new mouse, so I'm back with the one without the scrolly
I can't listen to any of my new songs
I can't watch any of my new videos
Now tell me whether I should be happy about getting my cable back or not...(& I still don't know what I can/should do to get my XP working with the modem!! x_x)
P.S. Did I mention that my MD player also broke down (for good this time) on the same night??
Two nights ago, the worst possible thing happened to me - my cable went down. Actually, it was my modem that short-circuited after a Goddamn lightning bolt hit near my house. So for two days, I had to live without internet. For an addict like me, it was simply unimaginable & unbearable. I was clearly suffering from the signs of withdrawl - irritation, irritation, & irritation. "Fortunately", a technician from Rogers finally came today to replace the modem (even that took nearly 2 hours). Everything worked fine - except for the fact that, somehow, my Windows XP isn't recognizing the new modem & still keeps telling me that my cable connection has been unplugged. This means that if I REALLY want to go onto the internet, I will have to use the last resort, which is exactly what I'm doing now. That, ladies & gentlemen, is called "using my old & crappy computer which runs on Windows 95". Oh the horror.
I made a list of advantages & disadvantages of doing so...
Advantages
I can go online & therefore can talk to my friends through ICQ
A majority of my CM collection (the old, "cream of the crop" ones) is on here & I can watch them
Disadvantages
It is slow, VERY slow (at least 5 times slower than my new computer)
It is loud
I can download shit 'cause it has absolutely no space left
It freezes easily & frequently (did so while I was typing up this entry)
It runs on 800x600 resolution
MSN doesn't work on here
ICQ on here is still 2001b & IT FREEZES EVERYTIME I SCROLL THROUGH THE LIST
I can't use my new mouse, so I'm back with the one without the scrolly
I can't listen to any of my new songs
I can't watch any of my new videos
Now tell me whether I should be happy about getting my cable back or not...(& I still don't know what I can/should do to get my XP working with the modem!! x_x)
P.S. Did I mention that my MD player also broke down (for good this time) on the same night??
11.11.2003
Imminent Bankruptcy
Holy shit, so many new JPop releases that I want & need to get...xD
Singles
Hamasaki Ayumi - "No way to say"
Do As Infinity - "Hiiragi"
(bought them today, yay!!)
Albums
Nakashima Mika - "LOVE" (purchased 11.21)
Do As Infinity - "GATES OF HEAVEN" (purchased 01.09)
EXILE - "EXILE ENTERTAINMENT"
Amuro Namie - "STYLE" (purchased 01.09)
Hamasaki Ayumi - "Memorial address" (purchased 12.22)
Kuraki Mai - "Wish You The Best" (ordered 01.31; received 02.09)
DVDs
Do As Infinity - "8" (purchased 01.30)
Feel free to come back & see whether this list gets all crossed out in the end (or to see if more items are added)...=P
Holy shit, so many new JPop releases that I want & need to get...xD
Singles
(bought them today, yay!!)
Albums
EXILE - "EXILE ENTERTAINMENT"
DVDs
Feel free to come back & see whether this list gets all crossed out in the end (or to see if more items are added)...=P
11.09.2003
Blooming Lotus
Since I'm trying really hard not to do my German Aufsatz (in which I have to pretend I'm a teacher & write a note to a parent whose daughter got in trouble for listening to rock music in class, lol), I've decided to instead write a review on Nakashima Mika's latest album, "LOVE". First of all, the title's cheesy - it's been done WAY too many times. Secondly, the cover's not cool. It would've been much better if she didn't, er, bite on a piece of of artificial-looking flower. =P And finally, comes the music. I've never been a true Mika fan, although I do check out her singles whenever a new one comes out, & for this album, at least, I've liked all of them except "Seppun" (yes, I even grew to like "Love Addict"...it's a bit too long though). "FIND THE WAY" & "Yuki no hana", in particular, have entered my list of all time favourites (the second one especially...I'm still so in love with it). Since I never bothered to check out the c/w's on the singles, I actually got to hear quite a bit of "new" material from her (as opposed to 3, which is the real number of new tracks). This album has a very apparent jazz undertone, you don't even have to know jazz that well to realize it. The first track, "Venus in The Dark", is a good indication of the album's sound. Good song, by the way. Not as great as I expected, but it's still fresh & atypical. The album versions of "RESISTANCE" & "Aishiteru" are both awesome, though I must say I like the original "Aishiteru" slightly better (I think it's the strings...they really make the song romantic). "You send me love" would've been better if the verses didn't sound so 70's (& without so much English lyrics...her pronunciation's okay, but not fond of it either)...chorus is awesome though. Unfortunately, other than these few songs, the others are only mediocre. This is an album that I'd only listen from top to bottom if & when I'm doing something else & not paying full attention to it. And that's not really a good thing...=P
Usually I refuse to grade music with a number, as I'd get all iffy & never stick with one (& also because I believe the hardwork put into an album can't be summed up in one number/letter), but this time, I have a really clear digit in mind - a 7. It's already good enough for me to buy it, although it probably won't stay in my stereo for long. Now looking forward to hear DAI's latest, "GATES OF HEAVEN"!! =)
P.S. Seriously, of all songs, why would Mika pick "Seppun" to do a cover of?? I know I'm not the only person who finds it boring & sleep-inducing...waste of studio time, I say. (it's funny 'cause on the CD jacket, she really does pose in a sleeping position, lol)
Since I'm trying really hard not to do my German Aufsatz (in which I have to pretend I'm a teacher & write a note to a parent whose daughter got in trouble for listening to rock music in class, lol), I've decided to instead write a review on Nakashima Mika's latest album, "LOVE". First of all, the title's cheesy - it's been done WAY too many times. Secondly, the cover's not cool. It would've been much better if she didn't, er, bite on a piece of of artificial-looking flower. =P And finally, comes the music. I've never been a true Mika fan, although I do check out her singles whenever a new one comes out, & for this album, at least, I've liked all of them except "Seppun" (yes, I even grew to like "Love Addict"...it's a bit too long though). "FIND THE WAY" & "Yuki no hana", in particular, have entered my list of all time favourites (the second one especially...I'm still so in love with it). Since I never bothered to check out the c/w's on the singles, I actually got to hear quite a bit of "new" material from her (as opposed to 3, which is the real number of new tracks). This album has a very apparent jazz undertone, you don't even have to know jazz that well to realize it. The first track, "Venus in The Dark", is a good indication of the album's sound. Good song, by the way. Not as great as I expected, but it's still fresh & atypical. The album versions of "RESISTANCE" & "Aishiteru" are both awesome, though I must say I like the original "Aishiteru" slightly better (I think it's the strings...they really make the song romantic). "You send me love" would've been better if the verses didn't sound so 70's (& without so much English lyrics...her pronunciation's okay, but not fond of it either)...chorus is awesome though. Unfortunately, other than these few songs, the others are only mediocre. This is an album that I'd only listen from top to bottom if & when I'm doing something else & not paying full attention to it. And that's not really a good thing...=P
Usually I refuse to grade music with a number, as I'd get all iffy & never stick with one (& also because I believe the hardwork put into an album can't be summed up in one number/letter), but this time, I have a really clear digit in mind - a 7. It's already good enough for me to buy it, although it probably won't stay in my stereo for long. Now looking forward to hear DAI's latest, "GATES OF HEAVEN"!! =)
P.S. Seriously, of all songs, why would Mika pick "Seppun" to do a cover of?? I know I'm not the only person who finds it boring & sleep-inducing...waste of studio time, I say. (it's funny 'cause on the CD jacket, she really does pose in a sleeping position, lol)
11.04.2003
Black Jack
I'll be gambling tomorrow...& the bet is so high, I can't afford to lose. Let's see if I win.
EDIT: And I did. =)
I'll be gambling tomorrow...& the bet is so high, I can't afford to lose. Let's see if I win.
EDIT: And I did. =)
11.01.2003
Stop! In The Name Of Love
This entry is just here for one reason - to show the world that I'm still alive. =P I don't know what's been going on, but my writing bug is just dormant & I can't seem to wake it up. Either that, or my bio essay that was due two weeks ago has sucked all the life outta it. Anyhow, my life's been very eventful, which makes it even more ironic that I haven't been updating frequently (FYI, I've only updated 5 times in October, which has successfully made it the month with the least entries since I began blogging). I guess I just no longer feel comfortable sharing my life with the world, especially now that these encounters have become so personal (not to mention I know that certain someone involved will probably read it). My rationale behind blogging is to jog down feelings or memories that I see significant, in case I forget them after a period of time...it's sorta like a time capsule. Now though, I'm not so sure whether I want to continue sharing these emotions with strangers of the cyber world. And I know for a fact that I will not forget these incidents, as they have been playing over & over again in my head since they happened. Frankly, I wish we could just skip all the drama & go straight into a relationship, but I think that with so much going on around us, it's probably not such a good idea. Plus, courting is kinda fun, non?? ;D
This entry is just here for one reason - to show the world that I'm still alive. =P I don't know what's been going on, but my writing bug is just dormant & I can't seem to wake it up. Either that, or my bio essay that was due two weeks ago has sucked all the life outta it. Anyhow, my life's been very eventful, which makes it even more ironic that I haven't been updating frequently (FYI, I've only updated 5 times in October, which has successfully made it the month with the least entries since I began blogging). I guess I just no longer feel comfortable sharing my life with the world, especially now that these encounters have become so personal (not to mention I know that certain someone involved will probably read it). My rationale behind blogging is to jog down feelings or memories that I see significant, in case I forget them after a period of time...it's sorta like a time capsule. Now though, I'm not so sure whether I want to continue sharing these emotions with strangers of the cyber world. And I know for a fact that I will not forget these incidents, as they have been playing over & over again in my head since they happened. Frankly, I wish we could just skip all the drama & go straight into a relationship, but I think that with so much going on around us, it's probably not such a good idea. Plus, courting is kinda fun, non?? ;D
