"This is a pleasant surprise, Mrs. MacDonald, or may I call you Rosemary?"

"As in Rosemary's Baby?"

"Touche! I knew you were a worthy adversary when I met you at the baseball game and you challenged me. I assume you know what's happening and what your choices are." He leered at her. It wasn't pretty.

She looked around the office. "Tell me, where is the firm's motto engraved? ‘Abandon hope all ye who enter here!' I would think it would be carved over your door."

He laughed. "An English major, I assume. Then you also know ‘It's better to rule in Hell than to serve in Heaven.' One of my favorites."

"I was never really crazy about Milton and Paradise Lost, but it's certainly appropriate here. But as to my choices, I have none. I refuse to harm my son--our son--to save myself. I think you've known that all along. So you've lost. I just wanted to tell you that. And I wanted to give you this." She laid a small sprig of a plant on his desk. "Here's rosemary."

"That's for remembrance. I know. Don't worry, Rosemary. I can't forget you. You've cost me the brightest protégé I ever had." As she turned to leave, he added: "And your friends won't be able to help you any more than they already have. I'm sorry I didn't think to protect the nausea spell from being broken. Well, you and Lindsey can enjoy the short time you have together. It won't make any difference in the end. And please, on your way out, send Lila in." When she left and Lila reentered, he opened his belt. "This time, Lila, slowly. The way I like it. And look at me. I don't want you closing your eyes and thinking of Lindsey." What do all these women see in him, he wondered. Even Darla had shot him a look or two! He settled back in his chair.

Autumn turned into winter. On Halloween Lindsey and Rosemary strolled through one of the large shopping malls, watching the costumed children and their parents going from store to store collecting treats. Both of them were picturing Lindsey Jr. in a little Disney costume holding both of their hands while Rosemary carried his treat bag. Tears came to their eyes, and they had to leave. She was starting to show now and had bought a few maternity clothes. Not too many; they wouldn't be needed for long. Dr. Scott had predicted a due date in January, based on the baby's rate of growth. He said he'd have to put her in the hospital for a Caesarean. She wouldn't be ready for a normal delivery.

A few nights later, as they were lying in bed trying to sleep, Rosemary suddenly sat up.

"What's wrong?"

"He moved. I felt him. Here." She placed his left hand on her stomach. He felt a little flutter and then another one. Bending over slightly, he kissed her right where he had felt his son kick. When he raised his head, there were tears in his eyes.

"That's our son. Our little boy. I can't believe it. He has to live. You both have to live." He held her close to him for a long time until exhaustion brought sleep.

"Why should we celebrate Thanksgiving? Look at what's happening to us? What do we have to give thanks for?" Lindsey asked as they drove to the supermarket to buy a small turkey.

"We have each other. We've had a year of more happiness than most people have in a lifetime. Probably even more than Angel's had in all those years of his." He had to agree. He breathed another quick prayer, God, please take me but save her and our baby.

I deserve to be the one to die. She doesn't. And our son doesn't either. Take me!

Occasionally, they would hear from Wesley or Willow. No news was definitely not good news. Once a package came in the mail from Willow. Rosemary opened it to find chocolate chip cookies. She called Willow to thank her.

"Willow, these are delicious. What's in them?'

"Eggs, butter, flour, sugar, chocolate…"

"No, I mean what special ingredients are in them. What do they do?"

"They aren't magic, they're just cookies. They make you happy and fat. That's all!"

Smiling, she thanked Willow and hung up. They were delicious. Lindsey came in with a fistful, and she poured him a glass of milk to go with them. She poured herself a glass of milk, too, and enjoyed several cookies. She decided she'd make Christmas cookies. The next few days were spent gathering recipes, shopping for the ingredients, and baking. After filling up a couple of cookie jars for themselves, she sent boxes of cookies to the Thompsons, Dennis, Wesley, Willow, Tara, and Giles. She also found a lovely pendant for Willow, a rare old book for Wesley, and American Girl dolls for Beth and Lisa. Lisa was a little young for one, but she knew she wouldn't be around to give it to her when Lisa was old enough.

Lindsey called his friend Julie from Law School and asked her if she'd be willing to draw up their wills for them. He should have done it sooner, he realized. Julie was delighted to see him again. He noticed a beautiful engagement ring on her finger and the picture of a handsome dark-haired young man on her desk. She looked radiantly happy, until she noticed the dark circles under Lindsey's and Rosemary's eyes and the prosthesis that had replaced Lindsey's right hand. "What happened to you? An automobile accident?"

"Believe it or not, a vampire with an axe." Seeing the incredulous look on her face, he continued, "I should have listened to you, Julie. I could have lost more than my hand. If Rosemary hadn't come along, I could have lost my soul."

It didn't take long to make their wills. Except for a few special bequests, they left everything to each other, with Rob and Janice Thompson as their secondary beneficiaries. The insurance money would see to it that Beth & Lisa got to go to the colleges of their choice. Rob & Janice had been true friends and deserved some good fortune. As they were about to leave, Julie came around her desk and hugged them both. "You know I wish you both the best. I always did, Lindsey."

"I wish you the best, too. I hope he's the man you deserve." She smiled & nodded.

A week before Christmas Rosemary went out to do some shopping and came home with a bag from Beautiful Baby. Inside were a soft blue blanket, some tiny undershirts, a small box of newborn disposable diapers, and a beautiful satin christening outfit. "I thought he should have something beautiful to be baptized in," she said, although they both knew that she was actually thinking was something beautiful to be buried in.

Christmas Eve Rosemary & Lindsey attended Midnight Mass. They had both gone to Confession earlier and, for the first time in years, he received Communion. He prayed harder than he ever had that Rosemary and little Lindsey would live. He gave her a silver picture frame with Lindsey Michael MacDonald Jr. engraved on it. She gave him the exact same gift. They laughed in amazement at how they were almost reading each other's thoughts. Christmas dinner was enjoyed with Rob, Janice, Beth, Lisa, & Dennis. The girls loved their dolls. It turned out to be a happy day after all.

On New Year's Eve they stayed home, danced a little (but not much, as Rosemary was tiring easily now that the birth was imminent), and debated about whether or not this was the start of the new millennium. Rosemary said it was because they would have started with the year 1, not the year 0! Lindsey said that billions of people couldn't be wrong! But it didn't matter. At least they were here to see it.

The next day, January 2, Lindsey set out for the office. When he got there, he found a memo that he had to interview Harry Ballard at the state prison to prepare for his appeal.  I thought it was the 3^rd, Lindsey thought, but he set off. About that time, Rosemary felt a pain so sharp it was like a spear going through her. I'm in labor! She realized. She tried to call Lindsey on his car phone but he didn't answer. The car phone hadn't come on when he started the car. Another pain was even worse. She managed to get to the phone and call Rob and Dr. Scott. Both of them promised to come immediately. Then, she called Father Brendan and told him to bring whatever he needed to perform a baptism and also last rites. Then she unlocked her door and collapsed on the bed. Sharp spasms of pain racked her body. Rob made it there first. He had been there when both of his daughters were born, but it was nothing like this. He held her hand and sat with her, feeling totally helpless. The pain seemed to grow worse and worse. When Dr. Scott arrived, he had a look of shock on his face. Then he started to work. It was too late to do a Caesarean. Father Brendan was put to work boiling water and finding clean sheets. Rosemary gathered all of her strength and let out a scream that was both vocal and mental. "LINDSEY!"

Although he was thirty miles away, Lindsey could hear her scream inside his head. He looked down at his phone. It hadn't come on. He swung a u-turn and headed back at a good 30 miles above the speed limit. Not five minutes later a state trooper stopped him. Seeing the look of desperation on his face, the trooper told him to get in and drove him home, siren blaring. The BMW was just abandoned on the side of the road.

When Lindsey Jr. was born, Father Brendan was ready. He baptized the baby as he gave a few weak little cries. Then, as he was placed in his mother's arms, he died. Rosemary was hemorrhaging badly. No matter what he did, Dr. Scott couldn't stop the bleeding. But she hung on, waiting to see her love one more time.

Lindsey came running in to see Father Brendan taking off his purple scarf and putting the vials of holy water and oil in his little satchel. He had seen that before when his mother had received last rites just before she died. The bed was a pool of blood, as Dr. Scott was frantically trying anything he could to stop the bleeding. Rosemary looked up and smiled when Lindsey came in. "I've been waiting for you." Remembering that those were the first words she had said to him just a short year ago in Starbucks, Lindsey dropped to one knee and put his arm around her. He saw the little blue bundle in her arm. She pushed back the blanket a little and showed him dark wavy hair and a beautiful little face. "He looks just like you, I know it. Father Brendan baptized him. Our little Lindsey."

Through his tears Lindsey managed to get some words out. "Don't leave me, Rosemary. I need you. I love you more than life itself. Please stay with me."

"I promised you I'd always be with you, and I'll keep my promise. I'll always be there, even though you can't see me. I love you." Her eyes closed.

Dr. Scott moved closer to check her pulse, but Lindsey said, so softly the doctor could barely hear him, "No, she's just sleeping. She needs her rest now. Let me just hold her and our son a little longer. He's sleeping too." Although Dr. Scott knew that she had just died, he quietly left the room and went to sit on the couch beside a totally distraught Rob and Father Brendan. Rob had turned the radio on softly. Dennis was playing the Leibestod (Love-Death) from Tristan and Isolde. When it was over, he announced that it had been in memory of their beloved librarian Rosemary MacDonald, as was the next selection, the Lachrymosa from Mozart's Requiem.

A little later Dr. Scott came back into the bedroom. Lindsey was still holding them and weeping. When the doctor tried to tell him that she had died, that they were both dead, Lindsey vehemently denied it. Finally when the ambulance arrived to take the bodies to the morgue, Father Brendan and Rob were able to convince Lindsey to let go of them. Dr. Scott offered him a sedative, but he refused. He asked Father Brendan to begin planning her funeral, which he agreed to do. Then there was a knock on the door. It was Wesley; Willow had had a watch on Rosemary and called Wes to let him know that she had died. Hugging Lindsey, Wes told him that Willow was on her way from Sunnydale and would do anything she could to help. Numbly, Lindsey thanked him. He saw that Rob was a basket case and asked if Father Brendan would see that he got home. Rob protested, but he finally left with Father Brendan. Dr. Scott had left with the bodies.

When Willow arrived, she surreptitiously cast a sleep spell over Lindsey. She and Wes stayed there until he woke up.

When Lindsey awoke, he knew there were things he had to do. He asked Willow to invite Tara and Giles to the funeral, if they'd want to come. She knew they would. She also promised to call Julie for him. Then he let Wesley drive him to the cemetery, where he bought a beautiful plot on a small hill and arranged for a headstone with a carved marble angel. There would be room there for his name next to his wife's and son's. The groundskeeper agreed to keep fresh flowers there and to have a gas lamp by the grave that would go on every night. Rosemary hadn't really liked the dark, and the baby needed a night light. It was all Wes could do to keep from breaking down when Lindsey said that.

Two days later the funeral was held.   Rosemary wore the blue dress that she had worn to Alfredo's and to the party at Wolfram and Hart. Little Lindsey lay in the crook of her arm, dressed in the tiny christening outfit she had bought for him. Although the funeral director asked Lindsey if he should take off her wedding ring and Imzadi bracelet, he refused. He wanted her to have them on her always. He did take her crucifix and had it in his left pocket, where he could touch it whenever he needed a little extra strength. Somehow he knew she had wanted him to take it.

Almost everyone from the radio station was there except for the few people who had to work to keep it on the air. Cordelia insisted on coming with Wesley. Willow, Tara, and Giles were there. Julie came with her fiancé, another young lawyer from her firm.   The owner of the religious gift shop where Rosemary had bought their crucifixes and their wedding rings closed his shop for a few hours and came. To Lindsey's surprise, a few of his fraternity brothers and some law school classmates showed up, along with his favorite professor, who had come down from Hastings. Dr. Scott was there, along with his pretty redhaired wife.   Kate Lockley was in attendance; she even put her hand on his shoulder and told him she was very sorry for his loss. Two people from Wolfram & Hart were there: Chris "Gruber deal" Tyler, who was basically a pretty good guy, and Linda Matthews, the pregnant secretary. Lindsey was afraid for her. He'd have to get Willow to do a protective spell over her and her baby if it weren't too late already. A beautiful woman with auburn hair and an older, grayhaired man walked in. "Parker! How did you know? And Sydney. Thank you for coming." Miss Parker kissed him on the cheek. Sydney reached for his hand and then, impulsively, hugged him.

"How are you holding up?" Sydney, who was a psychiatrist at The Centre in Delaware, asked. Lindsey shook his head. Miss Parker looked at him sympathetically.

"You found your dream girl and then lost her. I'm so sorry, Lindsey." Giving him a quick hug, she and Sydney found a pew, genuflected, and sat down.

There were two men far in the back of the church that nobody noticed. One was in his mid-forties but looked at least ten years older. The other was young, perhaps 20 or 21, good-looking in a sulky sort of way, wearing a gang jacket. Michael and Arthur MacDonald, Lindsey's father and brother, whom he hadn't seen in years, had come to pay respects to Lindsey's wife and son. They left before anyone saw them.

The ceremony was short but very moving. Rob gave the eulogy; then Lindsey got up to speak. "I had sold my soul, but Rosemary bought it back for me with her death. I loved her more than life, but she paid for all the wrongs I had done. I would give anything to bring her back. Little Lindsey didn't even have a chance at life. I can't bring them back, but I will see to it that they didn't die in vain." He then started to quote a poem: "Music I heard with you was more than music…" When he got to the end, his voice broke and the tears came. "They knew you once…" his voice trailed off. Wesley got up and walked to the lectern and finished the poem, "O beautiful and wise." He put his arm around Lindsey's shoulders and led him back to his seat. Beth, Rob's older daughter, took his hand and held it.

Lindsey, Rob, Janice, and Wesley went to the apartment a few days later and cleaned everything out. He told Janice to take whatever clothes and jewelry she wanted. Things that nobody wanted were taken to the Salvation Army. Lindsey moved into a spare room in the rectory of St. Malachi's and bought a computer and printer. Using the discs that he had copied from Wolfram & Hart, he began to set down on paper everything he knew about the firm. He spent all of his waking hours working on it, only coming out to eat. It took him several weeks, during which time Holland was frantically trying to discover where he was and what he was doing. As Lindsey never left the church premises in all of that time, they didn't find him. The day he finished, he printed a hundred copies of his research and faxed or emailed them to all of the major newspapers, networks, and news magazines. A copy went to the California Bar Association and another to Kate at LAPD headquarters. He even sent copies to the Star and the Enquirer. One more went to Angel Investigations.

That was the beginning of the end for Wolfram & Hart. The senior partners vacated the premises before anything happened and relocated to Washington, DC, where a brave new world opened up in front of them. Kate allowed Lindsey to come along when they made a number of arrests. When she put the handcuffs on Lila, Lila looked at Lindsey and asked, "Why, Lindsey? You and I together could have made it to the top."

"Like scum on a pond." Lindsey replied.

The next day, Lindsey MacDonald vanished. He sent notes to Rob and to Wesley telling them not to worry about him and thanking them for their friendship and all of their support. Rob's contained a large check. Lindsey had liquefied all of his assets and turned them over to Rob, along with the pink slips for the Lexus and Rosemary's Miata.

Five years later, at a small church not far from Los Angeles, a thirtyish couple was getting married. The priest looked down at them and said, "I can see that you love each other very much. Cherish that love. Cherish every minute you have together. Love is the greatest gift that God can send you. Never forget this. Never take your love for granted." He completed the ceremony. The handsome dark-haired man kissed his lovely bride joyfully.

Later, in his room, Father Lindsey MacDonald took off his vestments and looked at the picture of Rosemary that Rob had taken on their wedding day and smiled. I can feel you with me, Rosemary. I love you.

A soft whisper echoed in his head.  I love you too, Imzadi. He thought he felt a soft touch on his cheek. Lindsey was content.