this page will be all about the enigma that is, the 2004 disney adaptaion of around the world in 80 days
this movie, with a budget higher than lord of the rings, is very loosely based on the original novel of the same name, starring jackie chan as a late 1800s frenchman, steve coogan as a really stupid guy (who is supposedly very smart), and cecille de france as the most annoyingly pleasant person in the world
alongside this cast are arnold schwarzeneggar (who had to take a break from movies after this disaster), owen and luke wilson (orville brothers), jim broadbent (comical villain), kathy bates (as the queen), ewen bremner (as slapstick comic relief), and daniel wu (pre badlands).
it's very obvious this movie is BAD. it is full of jokes that are not funny, it's badly editted, there's a nonsensical sub plot to tie in jackie chan, the main character (steve coogan) is very stupid and boring, yet everyone seems to think he is inspirational and brilliant, the acting is ridiculously over the top, and it's a huge disservice to jules verne's wonderful book.
there are GOOD things about the movie however, there is passion EVERYWHERE! the score is actually quite great, there's a lot of fun sets, costumes, and production design, and jackie chan and cecile de france just shine with genuine happiness in every scene they're in.
they always have smiles that say "im having so much fun being a part of this movie"
the action scenes are all choreographed by jackie chan, exploring many different sets, such as an art studio, on a train, in an indian market, inside the statue of liberty, etc.
and just conceptually this movie is absolute bonkers. it is nucking futs. i imagine the sales pitch going a little something like this:
mr director: hello mr disney, i would like money to make a movie
mr disney: ok. what is this movie you want to make
mr director: the story will be jules verne's around the world in 80 days, but instead of historical science fiction, it will be kung fu
mr disney: hmm thats weird, how do you propose we do that
mr director: we'll replace the french valet with jackie chan and make a convoluted subplot about an ancient powerful jade buddha that some evil chinese warlord is trying to get for herself
mr disney: sounds good to me, here's $100 million
mr director: thanks, now i can also cast arnold schwarzeneggar.
a meeting like this would never happen nowadays, and if it did, disney would never approve. this movie ended up being critically panned and a financial disaster for disney.
i love this movie not objectively, but conceptually because this movie stands for everything that disney does not today
disney's whole strategy now is to make the safest movies possible, making passionless sequels, live action remakes of classics, and marvel movies
does anyone behind this aladdin abomination actually care about making a movie? the live action remakes that disney pumps out are void of any passion or originality, and they've already announced 9 live action remakes in the works, beyond aladdin
disney has perfected their techniques of marketing and nostalgia baiting, which allows them to get away with all these passionless, effortless, boring movies
around the world in 80 days however, was a huge risk, was full of passion from everyone behind it, but it was marketed terribly and bombed hard in the box office.
it is the exact opposite of everything disney stands for today but i would take this movie that tried and failed over any of the garbage disney mass produces because those movies never try in the first place.
a victory for you, around the world in 80 days
i did not mean to offend anyone with this opinion, thanks for your time. click here to return to jeff's castle homepage