Only a few years behind the times...

It's Beginning to look a lot like Christmas...
02/12/2002

Not only is it now the beginning of December (technically the 2nd, since it's almost 4am as I write this), but it's snowing. Somewhat heavily. Winter is definitely here... and I, for one, associate the arrival of winter with Christmas, that dreaded holiday-turned-marketing-extravaganza.

For the most part, I am extremely glad to be in Ottawa this year. It's nice to be in a city that gets snow on a regular basis, for a change. I don't know how typical this weather is for this city, but I do know that I am enjoying what I've seen thus far. All in all, at different times, a good 50cm of snow have probably fallen since the beginning of November. We've had a couple of thaws, so there isn't that much out there right now (probably 5cm-10cm where people haven't trampled, shovelled or salted thesnow), but it's been fun watching it snow.

Every time the snow falls, I've been taking pictures out my front window, of the winter scene. I've stopped now, mind you, because they all look alike. They're very pretty pictures, though (by my reckoning, at least). I might even end up posting some.

But I digress.

Not only does this place actually receive snow (winter rain is an abomination), but it even smells of winter. Some of that smell is probably not the healthiest (I know that poorly burning fuel is certainly one odour which I associate with childhood winters at my farm, where my siblings and I would pile into our toboggan and get towed by our neighbour's Ski-Doo), but most of it — wood fires burning in fireplaces, the dry smell of a field full of blowing snow, ... — is positively healthy. I hadn't actually realized that I could enjoy those elements of winter without actually going to my farm.

Mind you, I still want to go to my farm. My whole family, it would seem, is scattering for the holiday season. My sister and her boyfriend are off to visit his family in Winnipeg; my father will probably go to London to spend time with Linda's family; who knows what my mom and my brother are planning. In any case, I'll rent a car if I have to, in order to spend some time at the farm. A traditional holiday dinner with the neighbours would be a nice touch, but I won't impose. I just want to be there. It's cold, it's miserable, and the driveway is never blown of snow. But it's home. And for all but one of the last 20 Christmases, it's where I've been come Christmas morning. (The one we missed was a wretched one indeed. Half of my family was out of the country, and those of us who were still here would have gone, except that our car's transmission gave out three days before Christmas...)

So I know that I'm going to the farm, by hook or by crook. But that's about the only certainty this Christmas. I don't know if/when any big dinners are happening. I do not know how much time I'll be expected to spend with random relatives (mine or Martha's). I don't even know when I'm heading to Toronto. But I do know that I am going, bearing gifts.

And that, of course, is a clever segue into the other part of my pre-Christmas rant. The gift-giving. I feel, now that I'm out of the city and contact with my friends has been greatly reduced, that I should compensate for this newfound distance with gifts. Well, not so much that as the fact that I have a bit more time on my hands this year (although, alas, less money than usual), so I want to get particularly good gifts for people. My initial preference is to get items that are Ottawa-related, but I don't know how far I want to go with that. It seems the kind of theme that will get tired quite quickly, and I want to make sure that I'm not perceived as flaunting my new location, or anything that gaudy.

The fact that I have more free time than I'm accustomed to having weighs heavily on me. I feel that I should be productive (and I've been moderately successful in that field, although I tend to procrastinate terribly when it comes to shopping). I want to write all of my Christmas cards. I want to buy all sorts of gifts — even small ones — and have them all ready (and wrapped: I keep not having time to wrap my presents) by the time I see my friends.

For the first time ever, I run the risk of actually feeling pressure from the Christmas season. I'm used to feeling the gift-giving rush, and the need to meet a deadline. But I think I'm finally starting to listen to that part of me that insists that, now that I have the time, I do everything properly. It's the same part that had me organize a Christmas party a couple of years ago, and it's the part that's making me put together lists for cards, gifts and the likes.

I just wish I had the creativity and originality to choose presents that could satisfy this newfound urge to get it right.