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Peace - It Starts with Ourselves
In
1955, sick and dying from leukemia, twelve-year-old Sadako Sasaki
made a wish. She could still feel compassion for others in spite
of her suffering, and bravely commenced a daunting task of folding
1000 paper cranes. With each fragile crane she wished for peace:
a state of mind, the positive affinities that we develop with others
and the sense of harmony among nations. However, in order to be
at peace with others, we must start at the beginning - with ourselves.
Many
people today lack the secret to true happiness - that is, inner
peace. In this increasingly materialistic society, we are bombarded
with images of "perfect people" wherever we go. We in turn start
comparing ourselves negatively to others, trying to live up to someone
else's expectations of us. This pressure can come from thoughts
such as: he has more friends, she is better-looking, he earns more
money, the boss likes her more than he likes me, and so on. We must
strive to look beyond these petty views, which bring us unnecessary
suffering and unhappiness. As a serenity prayer states, "grant me
the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, the courage
to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."
It is only after we learn to accept ourselves for who we are that
we can begin to build lasting, positive relationships with others.
Good
affinities lead to harmony and peace with the people around you,
whether they are your family, friends, peers or even strangers.
Aim to do one act of random kindness a day and you will gradually
become a happier person when you see that you have brightened up
someone else's day. There will inevitably be conflicts with other
people at one time or another, but that is because we often forget
where they are coming from, and consequently fail to see their perspective
on the matter at hand. Venerable Master Hsing Yun once told a story
about changing perspectives:
There
was once an old lady whose elder daughter was married to an
umbrella merchant while the younger daughter was a noodle vendor's
wife. On sunny days, she worried, "The weather is so nice and
sunny, no one will buy any umbrellas. The shop may have to be
closed!" When it rained, she thought, "My younger daughter is
married to a noodle vendor. You cannot dry noodles without the
sun. Now there will be no noodles to sell!" Whether sunny or
rainy, she grieved for one of her daughters, and became known
as "the crying lady."
However,
one day, she met a monk who told her, "You just need to change
your perspective. On sunny days, do not think of your elder
daughter and think of the younger daughter instead. With such
good strong sunlight, she must be able to make plenty of noodles
and business would be very good. When it rains, when everyone
would buy umbrellas, think of your elder daughter. She will
sell a lot of umbrellas and her store will prosper."
The
old lady followed the monk's instructions. After a while, she
did not cry anymore; instead, she was smiling every day, and
from that day onward she became known as "the smiling lady." |
If
we can emulate the "crying lady" and change our perspectives a little,
we will be able to improve our problem-solving and interpersonal
skills, and then we can collectively tackle bigger issues such as
September 11.
The
terrible tragedy of 9-11 shocked the entire world and left a deep
emotional scar that will never fully heal. While one can empathize
with the United States' grief as well as understand the motive behind
other nations' involvement in the fight against terrorism, violence
is not necessarily the best way to solve this problem. Violence
begets violence and wars further even more wars. To quote Cardinal
Joseph Bernadin, "Society must send a message that we can break
the cycle of violence, that we need not take life for life. As a
civilized society, we must struggle to find more humane, more hopeful
and more effective responses to violent crime." On the same note,
David Borenstein once said, "One cannot subdue a man by holding
back his hands. Lasting peace comes not from force." After all,
it is true that "an eye for an eye makes us all blind" - the only
logical way to stop killing is to stop killing. Each of us has the
responsibility to foster an attitude that does not compromise our
efforts for peace, both within ourselves and with others, in an
attempt to conquer vengeance.
Peace,
in all of its forms, starts with ourselves. Although what we do
now may not seem like a lot, little things can accumulate and grow.
Remember that even a small pebble, when dropped into a pond, can
create ripples that eventually reach all the edges of that pond.
Individuals form small communities, communities form populations,
and populations form nations which in turn make up the world that
we live in. With this in mind, we can see that there is a strong
connection between a peaceful individual and a peaceful nation.
Sadako made 644 paper cranes, now a symbol of peace, before she
passed away. Don't let her efforts be in vain - together, we can
make a difference.
Jacqueline Leung
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