Downtown and East Toronto psychologists
West Toronto and Mississauga psychologists
by Jessica R. Gera
Relationship therapy for guys
Relationships--the Gossip Club
Dr. Kim answers questions:
Counselling for marriage breakdown
How to become a psychotherapist, counsellor or psychologist
When therapy is not therapeutic
What do singles talk about in Therapy?
More on my interest in psychology as applied to personal growth...
Psychotherapy and counselling--applied psychology
Nowadays there is increasing demand for online therapy with the development of technology that makes it possible. Psychotherapists in major centres such as Toronto are now available to clients in Northern Ontario and distant parts of Canada...see online counsellor. Distance counselling used to be by phone or asyncronously by email. Today there is also instant messaging, and most popular of all, video therapy. At first Skype was used for this, but there are now professional platforms with much superior privacy, Vsee probably being the most popular in Canada.
Online therapists help you to
Figure out what
is bothering you
How counselling works
A counsellor is trained to listen attentively in order to understand each client's unique situation, experience and perceptions. By doing so, and by coming at the material from the outside, he/she can help the client to think outside the box and see options that have been overlooked. For some clients it is helpful for a therapist to point out what he/she sees. For others it works better to wait till they see it themselves. So the more open-minded the therapist is, the better the counselling works. Needless to say, if a counsellor were narrow-minded and judgemental, the experience could be damaging instead of helpful. This is one of the reasons that analytically trained therapists spend years doing their own therapy. Although some therapeutic methods put much more emphasis on the relationship between counsellor and client than others, research has shown time and again that it is vitally important regardless of the type of psychotherapy.
Relationship therapy for couples--what works?
Typically psychotherapists practice individual psychotherapy for a number of years before attempting marital therapy, which is more complex and may involve dealing with competing needs and a lot of conflict, sometimes overt and hard to control. Marriage guidance can turn a dysfunctional relationship into a good one, sometimes even after many years of bad history. However, a bad therapy experience can further harm the relationship and the partners' emotional wellbeing.
The couple's and counsellor's goals need to be aligned. If not, there needs to be a discussion, and if agreement is not reached, it is not a good fit. It also follows that if the partners have conflicting goals, the process will not work unless they can be helped to negotiate a basis for working together. The therapist needs to be clear that he/she is not The Judge, and is not there to impose his own or Society's values on the clients. As many clients have a conscious or unconscious misconception about this (for example, some come to therapy hoping that the therapist will tell the spouse that he or she is wrong), it is important for the counsellor to be really clear. At the same time, a relationship therapist has an educational function and needs to be an active participant, so it is a fine line.
Mike Mares personal
page, University of Toronto
Nature, and Nature’s laws lay hid in night
It did not last; the Devil howling “Ho!
Best book I've read lately: Thinking, Fast and Slow by psychologist Daniel Kahneman
Many years of psychological research come together to explain the roles of rational and irrational thinking, with profound implications for psychotherapy.
I also recommend: Trick or Treatment by Professor Edzard Ernst and Simon Singh
Edzard Ernst is a professor of alternative medicine; Simon Singh is an acclaimed science journalist. They explain how therapies are researched and evaluated, and together they explore the evidence for alternative health practices, focusing on four therapies (one of them being chiropractic. I understand that the British chiropractors sued.) The book is both carefully researched and easy for someone without a scientific background to understand.
Movies to see if you missed them: The Third Man (suspense) Glory (civil war)
Series not to be missed:
Copyright © 2002 M. Mares, since updated